Got home tonight from picking Kaden up at Grandma Jan's. Were in the can in the driveway and he won't get out until Judith is over, now I don't know what disturbs me more, the fact that he is listening to the content of this song, or that he's listening to it and I feel the need to mute it when maynard says fuck. I guess since he does not understand what the song is about but rather likes the sound of it it's ok right, but why do the social implications of my 2 1/2 year repeating the work "fuck" concern me more then him listening to the lyrics of Judith. Maybe I'm subconsciously trying to balance all those times Matt has taken him to church. What do normal people do in a situation where two parents have completly opposite spiritual beliefs? Personal I would like Kaden to get a little older before being introduced to forms of religion or spirituality so that he can make decisions on his own, I just guess I don't want my son to be brainwashed or forced into beliefs that are not his own, but in all accuality how many of our beliefs are really truly our own?

...

sarah

Monday 31 January 2005 at 6:51 pm

One comment

I got a low B on my first Bio test. I didn't even think I was going to pass it. School this term is really getting to me and we've still got a term and a half until summer. If this term kills my 4.0 I'll be pissed at myself. I decided that I'm most likely going to change my major, so pretty soon I'll be going to the RN (registered nurse) program at SOU and then probally go on to get my nurse practicioner, ideally, I've decided, that I want to be a Psych Nurse it will cut about 3 years from my school, I'll be making about the same, maybe more, and I get to work hands on with patients instead of just shoving pills down their throats, and raping their bank accounts.
Zach tried to fuck with me last night and I gave him the single most awesome wedgie ever, put a hole in his hanes, john has pics, they are pretty funny I'll try to remember to get one some from him...


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Biology + Sarah = Headache

sarah

Sunday 30 January 2005 at 1:27 pm

No comments

hey foolks. i am in paris. it is ok. not great. i have been exploring ther city but today i am just reading at my hostel. my legs hurt and the city has lost it's apeal. my hostil is nice, but expensive. there is a bar and at first i wanted to go down to it. but was afraid. well it was not that good anyway. i have realized that this is not ther kind of socializing i am looking for. i dont want to party! it is hard to social ize with any one else because i dont speak french, and the french at least in paris dont have time for some american. i did spend the day yesterday eith a girl from dallas. melissa, she was very cool. and the dudes i have met in my rooms have been very cooll.
i am not liking paris though to be blunt. i a m depressed. i am thinking that amsterdam is next. tomorrow or the next. as far as sights go i have only been to churches, which are amazing. sacre de cure. and the dali museam. which is small but had great charcter. powerful music. and only weird obscure peices of his art. and a movie playng of his on repeat. a weird movie. anyway i love you all and will write again wen i get the chance this is am expensive computer to use.

par-rere-is

jonR

Sunday 30 January 2005 at 02:32 am

Four comments

Two items of business:

1 - I had a blind date last night with one of the most beautiful girls i have ever seen. ever.

2 - Nintendo is flying me to their headquarters in Seattle for an all-expenses-paid media convention. I'll be staying for 3 days. They are fronting the bill for a plane ticket (35 minute flight!), hotel room and food. They've done this before and last time, they gave each person a Gamecube, Gameboy and about 15 games. We'll see what happens. All of this, just because I work at the school newspaper. I have always loved Nintendo, but they just outdid themselves.

Girls & Nintendo

eric

Friday 28 January 2005 at 8:50 pm

Five comments

sparowes.jpg
Artist: Red Sparowes
Album: At the Soundless Dawn
By: Eric Feigner
For: The Daily Barometer
Link: Here.

The puddles that speckle the cracked sidewalks reflect nothing but the grey, overcast sky. Bare branches loom like jagged fingers, clawing at an ominously obscured sun while drably dressed pedestrians scuttle from building to building. Maybe it's the rain, or maybe its regret, but these days, everyone stares at their feet. Overwhelmingly dark, despite every indication, there is hope.

Eventually, every overcast sky breaks, revealing a long-forgotten sun still set in its place. In the dead of January, these fleeting moments are sparse, but Red Sparowes have perfectly captured the ephemeral nature of these transitory instances on their debut album, At the Soundless Dawn.

An uncanny collaboration bringing together members of Neurosis, Isis, Halifax Pier and The Cignal, Red Sparowes flawlessly juxtaposes the dark with the joyous, crafting a beautiful style of their own.

"When Isis moved to L.A., we started writing, and before we knew it, we had a bunch of songs," guitarist Josh Graham said in an interview with Diversions.

Set apart from their previous bands, Red Sparowes is epic without pretentiousness, heavy without being demanding and overly unique.

"Being an instrumental band, we kind of let the guitars take over for the vocal melodies," Graham said.

Opening with the eight-minute epic, "Alone and unaware, the landscape was transformed in front of our eyes," it's obvious that Red Sparowes is a notch above most post-rock / post-metal bands. Simplistic drums waiver over an ever-growing ambient landscape of effects-laden guitar feedback. Breaking through the murky backdrop, a pedal-steel guitar emerges, transforming the song with a simple string of notes. Layers upon layers dramatically wax and wane, completely engulfing the listener in its dark, yet victorious mood.

"We actually recorded this album about 95% live in the studio, all playing together. There's a few overdubs here and there, but it's definitely representational of our live performances" Graham said.

The titles of the seven tracks read like a paragraph and consequently, on the album, each song bleeds into the next, elaborating and extending the previous thought.

"The title of the tracks themselves are definitely influenced by different things, like some of T.S. Elliot's poetry," Graham said. "The overall idea is from -- well, it's sort of dramatic -- but, it's not really a political point of view. It's more of an observation: throughout Earth's history, there have been extinction events -- the ice age, the comet -- but each time, there's been a large percent of species that have died as an end result of the events. There's a lot of theories that the sixth event is happening now, the sixth extinction, and there are theories that speculate that some of the first species that are dying in relation to that event are the sparrows."

These songs are movements, and even though they work in isolation, as a whole, they represent a complete vision, full of minute nuances and wonderful subtleties. The amount of emotion and movement contained on this simple CD is astounding, even for the seasoned veterans that make up the band.

"It's instrumental music, but it comes from a different place than a lot of instrumental bands," Graham said. "We just hope that people can find elements in the music that they like."

Melding an aurally open landscape with moments of severe claustrophobia, the album's closing track, "The Sixth Extinction Crept Up Slowly, Like the Sunlight Through the Shutters, As We Looked Back In Regret" is a twelve minute testament to the sheer ability of the band and their ability to escape the anchors of the metal genre. Taking nearly six minutes to blossom, the track eventually explodes in a jaw-dropping crescendo, only to fade back into silence, completing the cycle.

Bouncing between brooding lows and awe-inspiring highs, At the Soundless Dawn directs the listener into a completely different place, somewhere indescribable.

Multifaceted, the album feels like the halfway-happiness between tears and a smile. With unmatched strength, Red Sparowes have succeeded, proving that you can look at the overcast sky and know that behind the clouds, the sun is burning, and these gray days will all be over soon.

Red Sparowes: At the Soundless Dawn

eric

Friday 28 January 2005 at 1:12 pm

No comments

hello friends. i am doing pretty good, visiting my family in CA. my flight leaves tomorrow. going to paris. i don't know what to think right now. i am nervious and excited. i have also noticed that i have been in a state of dreamland whenever i think about this trip. my mind is very free. i realize i cannot predict anything right now, so all of this wonder seems kind of pointless, but i like it. wonder is a good feeling.
as for right now. it is really good to see my family. My uncle mel (the infamous) and my cousin alysia. San Rafel, right by san francisco. is cool. a lot like ashlnad in some ways. but there is much more of a rich class of people. it surrounds me. arrogance is the best way to describe it. A constant divide between people. that is okay though i am having a good time.
Anyway i will write while in europe. wish me the best.
love jon r

well im off

jonR

Tuesday 25 January 2005 at 9:31 pm

Seven comments

I can safely say that at the soundless dawn by red sparowes is one of the best albums that I have heard in a long time. when it comes out next month, do yourself a favor and buy the shit out of it.

[January 25th edit: after repeated listens, I predict that this album will be huge. monumental even. ]

that's all, for now. i love you all.

red sparowes

eric

Tuesday 25 January 2005 at 11:43 am

Three comments

I just thought that I should tell everyone that the Smoke and Smoke album "Love Suffers Long" is the most badass radical duderadical muthaphukkin shit this side of coke and heroine mixed together with red food coloring bitch!

Aaron North, ex-guitarist for the equally dudical Icarus Line, is now the guitarist on tour for Nine Inch Nails, or NIN as they are referred to by everybody. It sucks that hes not in Icarus Line anymore though. Icarus Line.

and

Fantomas, The Locust, and Trevor Dunn's Trio Convulsant are going on tour! Together! No dates but they should be up on Ipecac's website soon! YAY!!!!!
Speaking of Fantomas,
The cover art for their new album Suspended Animation is on the website.

There ya go BITCHES!
GW BUSH IN 2008! WOOHOO!
much luv
sledgddgkjhflkshvdjng;ldnhgn;dnhg;hldjh;ldmb

SMOKE AND SMOKE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

ian

Tuesday 25 January 2005 at 10:54 am

One comment

today while i was riding the bus to school a very hip looking ecuadorian got on the bus.

he was wearing a mars volta shirt.

just thought you'd like to know.

on the bus

curlingiron

Monday 24 January 2005 at 08:58 am

One comment

i remembered the other day what my very first post on endysis was about. i was in fred meyer and i saw these little boys swindling money out of people. seriously, they were faking being poor or homeless or whatever and little old ladies were giving them quarters and whatnot so that they could "eat dinner" that night. ten minutes later, their mom comes walking towards them, with a weeks worth of groceries. they weren't poor, they weren't homeless, they just wanted to see if they could get the money. and they did.

now i'm here, in ecuador, and every time i go walking down the street these little children, dirty and dressed in rags, come walking up to me with boxes of gum, looking at me with these desperate faces saying "compre chicle, por favor. señorita, por favor, lo compre..."

please buy gum, miss. please, buy gum.

today one little boy followed nicki and i for five blocks. he was so small, maybe four years old, and he had to literally run to keep up with our walking pace. the whole time, "por favor, señorita. por favor"

it kills me. when i watched those little boys at freddy's, i remember thinking to myself that, for as horrible as that is, i almost wish i had been ballsy enough to try and pull a stunt like that when i was little. but now.... i hate going out and seeing these children, these people, everywhere i look. selling gum is their source of income. the little boys that run around with their little wooden shoeshine kits, barefoot and dyed black because all day they are trying to earn a quarter by shining up the shoes of some men...

i hate that when these people look at me they see some rich american, someone who has "the life" (whatever that life is) and all they can do is beg, hoping i'll have some spare change.

but even if i gave a quarter to every little kid who asked me, what about the next day? they'd still be stuck in the same situation, and i can't do anything about it.

i love it down here. i'm having the time of my life... in some respect. but at the same time, i want so badly to be in oregon where i don't have to see this, don't have to think about how much i have when others have so little. it's easier to ignore it there. here, it's almost unavoidable.


siempre.....

painful is the word

curlingiron

Saturday 22 January 2005 at 3:05 pm

No comments

title: Rabo, first blood

enemy Aliases: Rabo the: foolhearted, nice guy, Rocketship, weak and winmp, anoying motherfucker, ant eater, and MOoselips.

Powers: Rabo is an incarnation of past action hero status. Where as past action heros such as arnold and jean claud are now pussies being led by their noses in a quest for power, or just don't have game anymore. Rabo is an action hero with something fresh. picture a buff white dude, in a tang top, with army hat and long hair in a pony tail. BUT, in place of guns or rayguns input flexing mussles and a third eye mind cannon that shoots 8th demensional humbling bullets.
And by his side his trusty pup, scooter, she could die at any minute, so there is no more fear left in her, she'll eat your balls and cough them up hairball style.

origin raised on the mean streets of A-town, this man can walk any form of hippy lifestyle. Yuppie walk. Dirty smelly bathless smell. new wave spirit mind. Old wave, commune heart. Get drunk and party college style. Fuck highschool girls, hard. and pederistrian right of way power. Wrapped up in a big alien conspiracy to throw everything off track.
Rabo's dad was a mutant, and his mom a tranasaurus. Upon his birth he swallowed all of his siblings to focus all energies on himself. It worked. Now Rabo's Ascended shadow reaks at 25 foot above sea level. Meditating in the mountains it makes love to the trees, and makes fart bubbles in the stream. A-town is now known as the crash site for allien landings but when mars attacks, Rabo will be there too.

strengths and weaknesses girls, booze, and big muscles.

hope to one day be human.

destiny to be caught up in the inter-demensioal time rift sparked by medfordite crack rocks melting a hole in the demensional atmosphere. He will be the bath tub plug, attached by a metal chain to the porcalin water holder thing.

other info Favorite color green, favorite food icecream, favorite job work.

quote keep your eyes on the future, and off my ball sak---Bitch!

Rabo, hero status

jonR

Tuesday 18 January 2005 at 01:33 am

Two comments

Name: eric
Alias: Pelican Sanders
Title: Godsmasher, esq.
Strengths: HTML, smiling, arm wrestling, tarot cards, battery eating, flying (but not really)
Weaknesses: Brunettes, communism, bullets.
Origin: Waking in a small thatched-roof hut, the man walked outside. The rolling hills were covered in a fine film of mist. He looked at his hands and realized that he had no idea who he was, how he got there or where his wallet was. He surveyed the house, nothing to be gained, save a few bamboo poles (which he fashioned into long spears). With his trusty spears in hand, he headed off towards the ever-looming mountains. After 13 years of walking, he realized he was on an island and had merely been going in circles, partly due to his compass being made of bamboo (not the same bamboo used to make the spears, though). After making a boat from bamboo (not the same kind used to make the compass, but the same kind used to make the spears), he set sail for the distant shores of wherever. He ate fish and talked to the dolphins (who talk mad trash, btw) to keep himself sane. Finally, he set foot on solid land. He was in New York. Then, he dated a model, did a lot of coke, joined a rehab group, started dating a fat chick, started working at best buy, saved his money, bought a computer and some bamboo, make another boat and went back to the island, laptop in hand (SO HE COULD USE THE INTERNET, STUPID).


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HERO STATS: eric

eric

Monday 17 January 2005 at 11:49 pm

Two comments

This is by far the most difficult time i've ever had getting through a book. The fact that it is so short is a big slap in my face also (166pg.s). It bores me so much that it has put me to sleep 6 times.

A Few Quick Deals:

1. Buy Saul Williams new self titled album. It is fabulous as is the man who made it. Zack de la Rocha is featured on a track. What the fuck is up with that guy. At this point if he were to release anything, no one would care.

2. The online poker fuckers that are posting in our comments section should be mauled to death by a whole bunch of Krumping Republicans. I can't think of a worse death. Maybe if they got shot repeadedly in the nuts by a pellet gun untill their dick got infected and they died a slow painful death. IF YOU ARE GOING TO ADVERTISE ON THIS SITE CONTACT ERIC ABOUT HOW MUCH YOU ARE GOING TO PAY HIM, YOU PIECES OF SHIT. I swear that if I find out where you peoople are from I am going to do something ugly. (Something Even worse than sending you a picture of my un-wiped tape-worm infested hairy pink puckered smelly butthole)

3. I saw White Noise the other day during THE WINTER BLAST. The WINTER BLAST is the official name of the Ice storm that hit portland according to channel 6 news (the news channel that hit me with their car and drove off). I was expectiing to be dumb, but it was fawking retarded (said with a Jersey accent). I don't even think they read scripts anymore in hollywood. This movie broke all its own rules it set forth. Not only that but a movie about ghost s that are trying to get Micheal Keaton through his VCR is fawkin retarded (jersey accent). Then they escape and kill him at the end, after his dead wife lures him into a werehouse where one of his employees is in cahoots with the murderous ghosts. Im dead serious. I just told you the ending.

much luv,
SLEDG

Snowbird Cherokees: People of Persistance by Sharlotte Neely

ian

Monday 17 January 2005 at 11:11 pm

One comment

Name: Sledg Brainerd
Alias: Roberto Lincoln, Pelican Sanders (yeah eric), Popo the Donkey, Carlos Wilson
Title: The legend of the World
Strengths: Big Strong Penis, Running on four legs, Jack Daniels, and Flying Butt Pliers (Guess the referance), referances, the wit of Jesus, Contra
Weaknesses: Poontang, Hit's in the Ball's, Eric's Asshole, The Mars Volta, Jack Daniels
Origin: Born a nocturnal albino rat fox, Sledg was walking to find food for his children when he slipped and fell in a puddle of puke that a bum had thrown up a week before. At that moment their was a lunar eclipse and some fog. He does not remember the next few days but when he came to, he was in bed with a ton of chicks and was a human being. He was fingering all of them in their butthole, but told them to call them their "kissy lips". So when stories of his "kissy lips" fingering rode a yellow dragon (not the chinese kind) around southern Oregon and returned to him , he kissed it and made it suck his dick till it sqirted blood all over his magazines. Not to be outdone he went and killed Doc Oc, Venom, Carnage, The Green Goblin, The Lizard, Osama Bin Lama, and Tsunamis. Because Spider Man was being a bitch about it, he slapped him on the back and kicked Kirstin Dunst's head threw the goal posts. This was when he was legally recognized as the legend, by every country in the world except Madgascar, The Congo, and Sweden where he was named as a honarary citizen instead.


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Sledg's Hero Stats

ian

Wednesday 12 January 2005 at 10:06 pm

Three comments

if im found dead in thew future, blame it on regal cinemas.

things i hate (surprises ahead):
meet the fockers (worst movie ive seen in years, even worse than alexander)
anime
poontang
customers
cilantro
popcorn
upselling
m night shyamalan
condoms
babies
people
food
sleep
booze
cigerettes
money

things i like:
sluts
blowjobs

blame it on the rain

ian

Saturday 08 January 2005 at 6:31 pm

Six comments

i am getting ready to go to europe, i will be there in tweenty days. it dosnt seem like much, but i leave ashland in 10 days to vist my family in california. I am a little worried about the trip. i have know idea what to expect. and i will be there all alone, in the cold. At the same time i am so very excited.
i am wondering what it will be like in ashlnad when i get back. most likely the same but a lot can happen in a month and a half. to all my friend in ashland and in the world i hope for the best for you. Things are changing so rapidly, and yet they stay the same, it is weird. people change so much in mind and spirit, and the parts they love, well hopefully they do not change. No i take that back, i hope they are not lost. Let those things evolve, and the rest, that shit that dosnt make us happy, let it be lost. alive only in memory. i was talking to Gabe about the good old days. you know them. we all have them. (for me).like smoking weed with tallon and nick, in some black berry bushes or some shit. Trying to be cool. Or living with ian in our first house when we were only 17. Working at the Varsity. With LARRY< and kim, and again smoking all that weed. Or when we first moved into the greenbriar house and drank all the time...and some times had girls over, stupid highschool girls that we really didn't care about. Miller light 30 packs.

i truely hope you all are good, that life is good for you, while i'm gone,a d n when i get back. and when...

well that is all for now. oh yea and metroid prime is a great video game. Nentendo is still the best video game maker out there. they know how to tap into all that makes video game awesome for me. Adventure cartoons with charcters that are important. All of these things in a fantasy world that trys to be jsut that. A video game.

the days have turned away from me.

jonR

Saturday 08 January 2005 at 12:14 am

Five comments

ok so i havent posted in like 5 months but things have been crazy. i finished off last term in one piece and still managed to keep my 4.0 somehow, even after finding out too late that the chemistry class my advisor "advised" me to take didn't count for my degree which was awesome, $600.00 later. I'm back on track though and am trying to mellow out this term and only taking 12 credits so i can try and get my head together. christmas was awesome, eli got a new guitar from me and i got a new airport card from him, which rocks, now i dont have to be isolated to the back room in the cold to use the computer and he can download porn from the comfort of our bed...


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hello all...

sarah

Friday 07 January 2005 at 11:05 pm

Two comments

Rent the Ren and Stimpy box set on dvd. Watch the banned episode. It is genious. Then watch it with commentary for a real eye opener. You access the commentary by pressing left whe the episode is highlighted in the special features menu. No, serious.

Awesome things

ian

Friday 07 January 2005 at 5:54 pm

No comments

1. Adrian Belew's first solo effort, Side One. Featuring Les Claypool on Bass, Danny Carey on Drums.
2. General Patton vs. The X-cutioners. Im interested to see how this one turns out since I don't understand what all the hype is about with the X-cutioners.

You betta fuck somebody.

SLEDG
ps. An evergrowing possability of me returning to Ashland for the summer. will keep you posted.


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january 25, 2005

ian

Wednesday 05 January 2005 at 5:42 pm

Four comments


this picture pretty much sums up my year.


1/1/05 - 2:00am -- walking home with Molly, i make a comment that i bet the door to a certain lecture hall was open. as we walked by, i try the door -- and sure enough, it was open. we enter. moving to the second floor, we make our way to the end. She quickly punches a few numbers on a keypad and the door pops open. gotta love breaking and entering.

overall it was a wonderful night.

this last year has been pretty amazing, I've learned a lot. Despite the setbacks and ever-festering scars of kim, it's been an amazing ride. This holiday season has taught me one thing though: I have the best friends and family -- i wouldn't trade 'em for the world, but if you happen to have a Jose Canseco rookie card, I'm up for negotiation.

now, i'm going to go on a 5 hour bender. I love you all.

In retrospect

eric

Saturday 01 January 2005 at 9:16 pm

Four comments